2017

Autosave-File vom d-lab2/3 der AgfaPhoto GmbHAt the start of a new year you get to witness the people around you rejoice in the chance of a fresh start and it’s great to see so much positivity, however short lived that may be.

Now I get that people also see it as a chance to lay the past to rest to look forward to a better future. Great, fine by me. What I find odd is the compulsion to wait for 00:01 01/01/?? to make these changes, a yearly confessional that skims over the last 12 months of stagnation. Why wait? For me it is important to make everyday significant, to constantly evolve, learn, adapt, and keep moving in whatever form I can justify. If that means spending my whole day in bed only leaving to pee and grab snacks that’s fine as long as that stems from a pro active decision in my brain to do so. Too often I have fallen victim to my own sporadic anxiety or passive emotion that leaves me bed bound without my consent, but I’m learning to work with it.

That phrase ‘New year new me’…grim. Don’t get me wrong I think it’s great people are enthused and feel powerful enough to make changes they want to see. In two weeks time when dry January has turned into just a dribble Jan I won’t see it as a failure. I know that at any point I have the power to put that Gin down and walk away and even pick it back up if that’s what I chose to do. Even on Tuesdays…fuck Tuesdays. Stop restricting yourself to manufactured new starts.

If there is one thing I have come to understand recently, it’s the value of reassessing our attitudes and how we treat ourselves and the people around us. Remembering everyone’s problems are relative and how dangerous it is to compare your issues with others. What may seem insignificant to you could be causing someone else pain. I also believe offering support to those you know need it, is imperative. However it is equally key to understand when you aren’t capable of doing so. There’s nothing so close to failure as an empty promise or gesture. Less words more action.

Personally I have found the ‘transition’ into 2017 hard, my family and particularly my dad are still faced with the same difficult circumstances we had just a day earlier, there definitely isn’t a refresh button when it comes to health in all the different ways that it manifests. However we are so capable of adjusting our attitudes and forgiving ourselves in turn. So in some ways I’d love for a yearly do over but a year is a long time to wait.

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